Typed up this article a while ago and thought in a community of role players, it may be helpful:
Should I stay and cuddle or go slay a dragon? That is a question that a role player with a girlfriend may one day have to face. Playing in a role playing game regularly and keeping your girlfriend happy can be difficult if you are not careful and considerate. To keep the peace, and your girlfriend, you should be aware of how you allocate your time, respect your girlfriend and her feelings, and if the game is at your house, clean up after the game.
The first important point to consider is how much time you spend role playing compared to how much time you spend with your girlfriend. If you spend more time role playing than with your girlfriend then you are going to argue and eventually break up. If you are having trouble balancing your time correctly and want some help, then I have a method that might work for you. Each week you dedicate time to role play and during that dedicated time you focus on role playing right? Well, just like how you dedicated time to role playing, dedicate time to your girlfriend. During the time dedicated to your girlfriend, put all your focus on her and only do the things that she likes to do. Always dedicate equal if not more time to your girlfriend. If I spend four to six hours role playing Saturday night, then I spend all Sunday with my girlfriend doing what she enjoys doing. Really try and make the time dedicated to your girlfriend all about her and have fun no matter what she wants to do.
Respect is another important point to keep in mind when you are balancing a role playing game and a relationship. If you and your girlfriend share a house and the game is being held there, talk with your girlfriend about ground rules that you can pass on to the group. Some rules could be no smoking in the house or no loud yelling after 11PM. It is important to make sure that your girlfriend is comfortable with each member of the group. Also, make sure each member of the group treats your girlfriend with respect. If your girlfriend does have a complaint about the game, listen to her and try to resolve the issue.
After a long night of adventuring it is easy to just leave the books and soda cans on the table for the morning and go to bed. This is a mistake that I still make and it is one we all should try harder to avoid. If your girlfriend wakes up before you and assumes that you left the mess for her to clean up, she is probably not going to approve of you having another game night. Maybe towards the end of the game you can ask a willing friend to help you pick up when the game ends. If the game is not being held at your house and you can spare a few minutes, then offer to stay after and help clean up.
Role playing games are fun but no one wants to lose their girlfriend because of their hobby. I believe dividing your time appropriately, respecting your girlfriend and her feelings, and cleaning up after the game will reduce or prevent any conflicts. In any case, no matter the issue, be willing to compromise.